“The participant’s perspectives are clouded while the bystander’s views are clear.” -Chinese Proverb
Loss is familiar, loss is current, recently near where I live due to Storm Sandy people lost their power, people lost their trees, people lost their furniture, people lost their pictures, their blankets, their memorabilia. Kids lost their toys, their bicycles. Many pets have been displaced and some have been lost…lost forever. People have died. The incredible relativity of life. We lose our money, we lose our gloves, we lose our jobs, we lose our friends…some because of distance, some because of an argument that for some reason we can’t mend, some because of illness or an accident. We lose our parents, some sooner than later. We lose our minds, some of us for what seems like a moment in a day…for some of us, it’s longer. We lose our sense of humor. We lose our commuter tickets, our underwear…where does the dryer put it? We lose our youth, we lose our looks, we lose our memory, we lose our strength…we lose our patience. We hear about how things lose their value, or we’re running out of time. We lose our control. There’s so much loss in the world. It makes you think-why bother getting up? The reason is, because we have to believe the sun will come up tomorrow…and it does. Tomorrow will be a new day, and it is. No, there is absolutely no way to replace people we’ve lost in our lives that we love…none, but they will live in our hearts always. We will not be able to replace the animals that we’ve loved…never. But, they too will live in our hearts always. I have lost many “things” I wish I still had, but most of those “things” I have over time, been able to replace, or have learned to live without-even neurological things (things that made me more me), like my loss of hearing or swallowing or vocal power, and some others as well. About twenty-three years ago now, my husband and I had just gained a new daughter; we went out for a walk and lost our apartment. All our things were covered in asbestos from a steampipe explosion. The things that weren’t ruined from mud, glass, and poisonous steampipe insulation, ended up being stolen by workers who were meant to be there to clean what we had left. Not all of loss is replaceable or it wouldn’t be loss, so hard this thing loss. As someone who has lost much, I know a couple of things…I don’t like it, not one little bit. I wish I could fix it. I like fixing things. I also know, that without knowing what it would be to be without, I wouldn’t know how great it was to have these things while I do. If there is anything to remember while you can still remember, it’s to appreciate what you have that you love while you have them. Nothing lasts forever, if it did, it wouldn’t be as special while it was here.